A social media comment by Nigerian content creator Uju Amaeshi describing dating as “consented rape” has sparked widespread debate online.
Amaeshi made the remark in a two-minute Instagram reel discussing expectations around intimacy in modern relationships. She used a lending analogy, suggesting that accepting dates and gifts could imply an expectation of s*x if there is an unspoken agreement between both parties.
During the clip, she said she met an older man who believed dating could be viewed as “consented rape” if one party benefits from the relationship while denying the other’s presumed sexual expectation.
She also pointed to legal provisions that punish broken marriage promises, arguing that they reflect how closely dating and sexual expectations are linked in some social contexts.
The phrase quickly went viral after being shared across social media platforms, drawing strong reactions from users who disputed the description.
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Critics argued that the term “consented rape” is contradictory since rape is defined by the absence of consent. Some also rejected the suggestion that going on dates or receiving gifts creates any sexual obligation.
One user wrote, “Marriage and dating are meant to be a sanctuary, not a loophole for sexual entitlement. Consent is like a subscription: it has to be renewed every single time. If it’s automatic, it’s abuse.”
Another commenter said, “No matter how it is explained, ‘consented’ and ‘rape’ can’t be in the same breath… If there is consent, it can’t be rape.”
Other users dismissed the idea altogether, with one writing, “There’s no such thing as ‘consented rape.’”
The discussion reflects continuing online conversations around sexual consent, dating expectations, and modern relationship norms.